Sunday, July 4, 2010

"Did you say, 'Billy, I love you'?"

Enough! Enough with boring what readers I may have, and it is time to finally speak of something that (hopefully) will be an interesting and maybe a captivating read. Enough with boring! Consider it done!

Have you ever sat and realized all the stupid things you have done in your life? Probably not, because not everyone does all the stupid things I do. Ba ha-sad! But true!
Aside from the usual falling up/down flights of stairs, spilling on white shirts and losing stuff I was just holding 2 seconds ago, I do some pretty stupid and embarassing stuff. You should feel privileged that I care enough for my readers that I am willing to let you in on some of my blonde moments.
If you haven't noticed this by now, I write best in lists. Get used to it ;)
"Kelsie's 'Did I really just do that?!' List"
1. One time in the 8th grade I was reduced to tears because of my clumsiness. It had been raining all morning, and for some reason, me and my friends were later than usual getting to lunch. We took the usual shortcut which consists of running down a very steep hill instead of going down stairs. This is where the rain comes in. Kelsie failed to think of the consequences of rain+hill+running would entail. Yep, you guessed it. "GRACE" here, slipped and fell quite a few feet on her behind in the mud. And, it just so happens she was wearing khakis and a light pink sweater. I won't speak anymore on this humiliating day, you get the picture.

2.9th grade. Coincidentally, the same flight of stairs at NC that I had bypassed in #1. The bell after first hour had rang and like the herd of students, I was trying to make my way up the stairs while another huge herd were trying to make it down. I was holding my stupid baby for that home-ec class all the girls take because it's that or shop class. I vaguelly remember talking to someone when my right foot didn't clear the stair and I went down. When I say "down" I mean DOWN and down hard! I was carrying my books and my doll so my hands were full, resulting in a deep cut on the knuckle of my right birdie finger-of which the scar I still have to this day.

3. Sunshine Terrace - my old place of employment. It was around my year-mark in December when this happened. During the holidays we got a lot of youth groups and single adult groups coming to visit people so they wouldn't be so lonely. On this particular day, the floors had just been mopped. (WHY they are mopped during the day is BEYOND me). So I'm charting and I hear a call light go off. Turns out, it is at the end of one of the halls just recently mopped. But did kelsie go down the side of the hall that the room was on?! Nope! She goes on the opposite, walks down the side (holding onto the bars because the floor was wet) and has to cross the hallway. So she decides split-second to just try and take one GIANT step. Yet again a recipe for disaster: kelsie+wet floor+shoes with no traction+visitors. Yep I ended up doing an odd version of the splits, screaming as I go down and I hear my shoes do a huge squeak!!!! As much as I hate to admit it, I am guilty of looking around whenever I do something stupid. This particular time, I glance over to the resident's room across the hall from my destination, and a big group of single adults had been standing in the doorway. AWESOME.

4. Lee's marketplace-GNO. I was driving with Karlie and Oliver in the car, trying to turn left towards Logan. I had my blinker on.... waiting.....waiting....waiting..... and finally its clear both ways except for one stinking car. The driver of this car puts his right blinker on like he is going to pull into the parking lot that I'm pulling out of. Turns out, some people put their blinker on very very early and if it weren't for Dash's quick brakes, we would've been smashed!

5. O.F. parking lot around Halloween. It was the weekend and I had packed up my laundry and such and was pullling out of my apartment parking lot turning right. I was too busy watching for cars on my left to notice any cars on my rigth. Yeah- I didn't turn wide enough and clipped a PARKED car. Luckily, the only damage done was to Dash (my car) seriously that other car was a TANK!! It didn't even have a scratch!! So now I have been driving around with a dented door for almost a year. "What happened to your door?" "Um, yeah. I ran into a parked car." funny.

That is plenty of humiliating moments for now. As more happen I will consider blogging about them. I hope they entertained.
Aloha
ps. some are just too bad to tell.

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